What to Divorce When You Are Divorcing: Inaction

You can’t stand still and move forward at the same time.  That’s why “take action” is the advice I offer women whenever they ask me a question regarding what they should do about a problem or respond to a challenge.   Here are a few examples:


Question:  My husband isn’t paying child support so I need to earn more money, I was thinking about going back to school and completing my degree.  I am afraid I won’t be accepted in the program I want to pursue.   What should should I do?

Answer: Take action.


Question:  Now that I am separated, I need to sell our house and downsize into a smaller space.   I have consulted with three realtors over the past seven months.  They all suggested I paint the interior, clean the carpets and complete a long list of other things before signing a listing agreement.  I have no idea where to begin, what should I do?

Answer:  Take action.


Question:  The lawyer I hired to handle my divorce is not returning my calls.  And when I have sat down to speak with her, she doesn’t really answer my questions.   I feel like she has taken my husband’s side and sometimes it sounds like she is trying to convince me that I should accept his settlement offers although I have tried to make it clear to her that I don’t feel they are in my best interest.  I keep paying her money although my gut is telling me that I am going to regret not firing her.   What should I do?

Answer:  Take action.


Question:  My ex and I have been fighting like cat and dogs.   I thought the fights would stop once we separated.  Since most of the stuff we fight about are really just petty disagreements about unresolved stuff from our marriage, I really think we could benefit from going to counseling.  I don’t want to get back with him I just want to stop fighting and start focusing on raising our kids.  I have been putting off suggesting counseling because I don’t know how he will react.  What should I do?  

Answer:  Take action.   


Question:  I met a really great guy at my daughter’s soccer game.   He and his ex-wife divorced three years ago.  He seems really nice and I am convinced he is interested in going out with me.  One of the other moms told me that he asked about whether or not she thought I would be open to going out on a date.  That was about two months and he still has not asked me.  Part of me wants to ask him out to lunch and part of me thinks I should just wait for him to make a move.   What should I do?

Answer:  Take action.


This is an excerpt from What to Divorce When You are Divorcing.  Download a copy here:
What to Divorce When You are Divorcing


Photo Credit:  Visual Hunt

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