Do you want to know the only thing that is worse than listening to someone endlessly moan and groan about her no go good spouse? Listening to someone moan and groan about her no go ex-spouse.
I have a cousin who was married 15 years to a guy she had no business marrying in the first place. Why? Because when they started dating he was still married to his second wife. Of course, neither one of them knew about the other. And when the truth was revealed, his wife had the good sense to kick him to the curb and my cousin foolishly allowed him to move in with her.
Two weeks after his divorce was final, my cousin stood in front of a church full of people and vowed to love, honor and obey him. And from that date forward, no family gathering was complete without everyone having to listen to her complain about what a rotten husband he was. He didn’t help with the bills or take care of their three children.
Since he never showed up at any of the family events, she complained about that too.
After a few years of this, it got to the point where I had become very strategic about where I would sit at family events ensuring that I would never be in close enough proximity to her to have to endure her complaining. I succeeded but it was exhausting, like playing a game of musical chairs with a group of kindergartners.
That’s why I am ashamed to admit that I was over the moon when I heard that she was finally putting him out. I mistakenly believed her complaining would end with the marriage. Their marriage has ended, they have been divorced for several years, yet she continues to complain about him.
Moving on after your divorce will be a lot easier if you have support and encouragement from friends and family. But, if you are constantly complaining then instead of reaching out to you they may run in the other direction.
This is an excerpt from What to Divorce When You are Divorcing Download a copy below:
What to Divorce When You are Divorcing
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